


Explanation

by Shiori_Makiba



Series: Problem Child [2]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Introspection, Self Confidence Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-29
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-08-09 12:06:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16449629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shiori_Makiba/pseuds/Shiori_Makiba
Summary: Ever since The Incident, Rukia had spent a lot of time thinking about how she was going to explain it.Part of the Problem Child series.





	Explanation

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to write a piece from Ichigo's POV next but it turned out that Rukia had more to say first.

Ever since The Incident, Rukia had spent a lot of time thinking about how she was going to explain it.

Her first plan was to not explain it at all. What she had done was illegal. She was already enough of failure in her captain's and brother's eyes without adding criminal on top of that. Ichigo had agreed to cover her patrol until she recovered. Her powers should return in a week's time, well within her allotted patrol time. As long as she sent in the needed reports, no one would ever have to know.

Unfortunately that plan almost immediately started to fall apart. Her powers did not return in a week. Or two weeks. Or three. It didn't take long for her to start worrying that her powers wouldn't return before her allotted time ran out. She was right to worry. Her return date had come and went. Her powers were still gone.

Failure to return wouldn't immediately set off a search. She would hardly be the first Shinigami to miss her initial return date for one reason or another. She had a grace period. She would have to explain what had delayed her. She had settled on telling her Captain a partial truth. That she had been fighting a Hollow, it had wound up being stronger than she had anticipated, she had gotten hurt – not life-threatening hurt but hurt enough to decide to avoid using her energy to create a gate until she was more recovered. Ukitake-taicho would lecture her about not signaling on her phone that she needed the Fourth and being more careful while he ordered her to report to the aforementioned Fourth.

She supposed if she had to, say if she was still almost powerless, to claim that the incident with the Hollow had done something odd and it was like her powers had all but disappeared. It wouldn't entirely be a lie. And everyone had heard of Hollows that could disrupt a Shinigami's powers. Especially everyone in the Thirteenth. After all, one of those unusual Hollows had killed their lieutenant, Shiba Kaien.

At least that was the story everyone knew. Not too many people knew that the Hollow had actually dissolved his zanpakuto and possessed Kaien-dono. Not too many people knew she had killed him.

Rukia felt the sting of tears and ruthlessly blinked them away before they could gather and fall. This was no time to cry about Kaien-dono. This was no time to think about the terrible feeling of her blade stabbing into his body. No time to think about feel of his blood soaking into her already rain-soaked clothes. No time to think about how he had smiled, **apologized** to her, and **thanked** her for killing him.

_Why? Why thank me? Why apologize? I'm the one who killed you. I'm the reason the Thirteenth doesn't have a lieutenant any more. I'm the reason Kiyone-san cried for a week. I'm the reason why Kaien-dono's siblings don't have a brother anymore. **Why?**_

Rukia pushed away those thoughts. It was hard. It had always been hard but it had gotten even harder since meeting Ichigo. He looked so much like Kaien-dono. Sometimes acted eerily similar to him too. To the point she could almost pretend that terrible night never happened, that Kaien-dono was still alive. Almost. And gods did it hurt when the moment shattered and she was sharply reminded the Ichigo was **not** Kaien. 

It wasn't fair to Ichigo to think those thoughts. He was his own person, deserved to be thought of as such. He was a good person. And he might have protested doing it at first and grumbled a lot when she tried to teach him how to do it properly but he had done her job. And done it pretty well considering how new all of this was to him.

Rukia had the feeling that if Ichigo had been a recent Academy graduate, the Captains would be fighting over who got him in their division. He had potential written all over him. And not just because of his insane amount of reiatsu.

_Focus_ , she scolded herself. She had promised her Captain she would explain. And he was still waiting patiently and politely for it.

The problem was that none of her planned explanations involved mentioning Ichigo at all. Hard for her to do now that he had managed to land them in Ukitake-taicho's office. The problem was she couldn't think of an explanation that would explain Ichigo and herself except for the truth.

Rukia took a deep breathe, steeled herself for the disappointment she knew was going to be on her Captain's face and began.

“This is Kurosaki Ichigo. He is a human I gave my powers to.”


End file.
